Writing the story of each of our furry baby is still an ongoing process...
Our Dearest Malachi
The reason we chose to tell Malachi's story first is because we want you to feel the same impact of this story as what Malachi had on our lives.
Malachi was a pure bred Arab out of Exceptional bloodlines. Unfortunately he sadly landed up on the slaughter lot where we purchased him. And so our wonderful journey began. Malachi was the wildest, craziest, and most scared horse we have met to this day. He had no confidence at all, even in the herd he was always bullied by the other horses with the lowest rank.
He needed immediate urgent medical treatment and the only possible way of coming close to him was in a crush. As we approached him for the first time he threw his head down to the ground with his whole body shaking so terribly that I am sure I felt the ground rattle. We could immediately see that this horse has been through immense abuse. (Our suspicions were confirmed by a reliable source).
We slowly started to work around him showing him that not all humans are the monsters that he thought them to be. A few times working as gentle as possible he nearly killed himself trying to get away from us. It was clear that he would rather be dead than to face his fears. After spending hours and days just sitting with him he started getting inquisitive as to say "will you not give up you silly human?"
We eventually got his halter on and I started grooming him very slowly every day and singing to him. It was very important to him that my body language stay very neutral as any dominance on this horse made him shut down completely. So the day came that it was time to start walking with him on lead and getting him halter trained. I am not sure who was more nervous over this experience…him or me? But Malachi was super intelligent and learned very fast. The day I realized that this boy had fallen in love with us as much as we did with him…was a miracle. He loved and trusted my husband and I and accepted our boys as part of his herd always walking up to them and greeting them and allowing a gentle rub on the forehead for a few seconds.
It was Time to back our beautiful boy…so we got the best people in the Business to help us and works only with love and communication - Roux Horsemanship. The day before the clinic my husband walked up to Malachi in the field and put his halter on and took him to his paddock, this assured us that he was ready.
Day one of the clinic was an absolute emotional rollercoaster for us and the audience. He could not handle any pressure with desensitizing and galloped for about 15 minutes in the round pen with the “rope chasing him”… so much dust that we could not see Bertie Roux anymore that was standing in the middle of the round pen. The whole time Bertie told us all to be calm and just relax as this needs to happen. Eventually Malachi, out of breath came to a stop, leaving a few seconds for the dust to settle….Bertie Roux approached Malachi slowly, picked up the rope, whispered something in his ear and Malachi blew out a breath that sounded like he was releasing all stress, pain and hurt in that one huge breath. Bertie said “your pain is over”…. All of us were crying at this point just watching how Malachi let go of all the ugly. We could literally feel Malachi’s emotion so intense that the whole crowd was moved by this boy. Marko took over at this point and started introducing him to the saddle which went very well and Marko rode him the same day. Day 2 was amazing and Malachi had accepted all that he was taught the previous day and my husband had the privilege of riding him. My husband was very nervous because we had been through so much with this boy…he was shaking as he got onto the saddle. Malachi carried my husband with all the grace, respect and love that he had inside of him. Bertie said that Malachi had the ability of taking negative energy and making it positive which is very rare for a horse who has been through so much as him.
The morning that Malachi passed was one of the worst days of my life ….the dreadful African Horse Sickness had infected him… he was on treatment for 4 days and fought as hard as he could…
The morning of day 5(this is the morning that I had to go in for a C-section to welcome the birth of our fifth Son) when I approached his paddock his eyes were bleeding and could not see…he cried out to me the whole time neighing because he could not see, asking me mom…”what Is going on?” I tried to stay strong and convince him that everything was going to be okay…but I could not keep it together as he was already taking shorter breaths…I knew what was coming….the pain inside of me for this boy was so intense that I literally felt my heart pain and throb in my chest. At 11:20am he died in my arms….. I have never seen anything in my life fight so hard until his last breath as what this Angel boy of ours did. Even as I write his story one year later is still feel the pain that I felt that morning.
Malachi you were definitely a one in a million boy that taught us so much about forgiveness, trust, acceptance and unconditional love. You showed me that no matter how scared I ever am…I can face my fears… and beat them! We carry your heart…we carry your heart in our hearts… until we meet again my boy.
My sweet Copper Love...
I have been in love with horses since i could walk.. i was privileged enough to have my own Arab Gelding named Charlton at the age of 10. We did everything together... everyday as i came home from school i would call and he would neigh and run up to me and everyday with him was an adventure. Sadly he passed when i was 14. This devastated me as he was my best friend. I cried myself to sleep for months...
Because of unfortunate events and my grandfather passing farm life sadly ended for us and we moved to the city. I still rode every opportunity that i could and if we ever visited someone with horses... that is where you would find me. After school i attended a gap year at our church " Find your calling" and in this year a few people Prophesied that i will be working with children and horses and healing broken people which was exactly what i wanted to do.
Well then life happened...and it seemed like i took every wrong curve steering me just further away from my passion. Being a mom of five boys i spent all my time and energy on the boys, and with always moving with my husbands work horses felt just like a distant dream...
We were situated in Postmasburg in the Northern Cape. I came across a lady that had a stable yard just outside town and this instantly flamed the passion in me all over again and i thought maybe..just maybe...
Our kids started with lessons by the stables and that was when i saw him...it was most definitely love at first sight- my sweet Copper. And it all started again.
When this boy looks at me he looks right through me, he has a way of moving the very essence inside of me. He gives me such a big sense of peace and in the same look convicts me.
He had severe trust issues so this is something we had to work on... it took me 30 minutes to catch him in his paddock, even carrots would not convince him. For 3 months i spend 3 hours a day with him to win his trust, he had issues with woman as he was not treated well by one in the past. Till today you can not tie him up as he freaks out completely.. "apparently he was tied up and beat because he would not stand for a farrier." I won this boys trust and he mine. He is an excellent school pony and excellent with kids and beginners. He gave me my confidence back. He has touched so many lives of little kids and nervous riders and even special needs children. He is just an amazing boy who stole my heart and reminded me how much i have missed having a soulmate for a horse. He was it for me.... and i thank God for you Copper, as your were the start of this all again. You have carried me with so much grace and patience and for this i am so grateful.
My heart horse Grace ( Standing at a massive 17.2hh- my Gentle giant)
You can not explain to someone what a heart horse is.. this is something you have to feel and witness for yourself...
As i sit outside appreciating the wind and the first solid drops of rain for the season falling on our roof, i think about all the difficult times we have overcome. I remember the first day I met you, you were underweight and had pain in all 4 your feet and your back was sore., just my hand stroking you on your neck and over your back made you pull your ears back and leaning over to bite me just to protect yourself from being touched by the wrong human again.
But it was your eyes that caught my attention, i saw a gentle and loving spirit inside of you, it was in this moment that i knew you must be mine.
We got the process going as i wanted you to be part of our family. Your foster mom at the time was kind enough to let us adopt you. After our vet did a thorough check on you she strongly advised us not to take you but we knew you would be worth it.. and oh how you were... and our beautiful journey to healing and freedom began...
I realize today that a spirit of fear came over me at this time trying to stop me from being your person, but despite the fear i pushed through as I knew you were given to me by God. You moved things in me i never knew possible. From the day that you ran away with my son and us struggling to calm you down as you were running around in fear of being beaten for your mistake, I knew you would never hurt a soul if you could prevent it. You were a caretaker, my gentle giant.
Our tough road started when you had your first leg injury.. which led to a long healing process, but in this time we found each other and I started learning what an amazing being you are. When I think back on a trainers opinion of you being a spoiled brat and refusing to communicate I realize that you never refused to communicate, you just never knew how, as no human had ever given you a safe place to communicate, and the day i put my feet in the stirrups, with my knees trembling, gave me a peace and confidence that I could not describe, somehow i felt safer in the saddle than walking next to you.
I remember our first outing at a western clinic where we both fell and it shook me up massively as i thought I did something to make you fall. Oh and how we were judged by the crowd for our silly mistake of backing up into a ditch, you waited for me to get up first... we made it graciously through that whole day with people passing judgement and taking photos of our silly little mistakes.
What I should of realized long ago is how little real friends we had and how the people we knew enjoyed watching us fail.. secretly judging our every move. What I never realized because I was blinded and mesmerized by these them, is how many times you showed me that these people are not our friends.
For the past year you have been fighting to keep me alive.. and i see it now, only by being in solitude...for a long time God was speaking to me through you... As i watch our videos of us riding together and how much fun we had. I see so much Love, peace, joy and unity.. I don't know if i have not seen it before.. but you gave me hope and you started to heal a very broken me.
my sweetheart... I need to ask your forgiveness for all the anger and disappointment I put on your shoulders that was never your burden to carry, and still you did. I need to ask your forgiveness for not protecting you against the evil that chased you because of my lack of knowledge. I need to ask your forgiveness for me giving up the fight, for me losing hope. You have given me a lifetime of memories, and moments locked in time forever, you have taught me so much, you have fought for me even on the days that I could not fight for myself.
I thank you Grace, I thank God for you, For choosing ME to be your person, it has been my absolute privilege. I will fight for you as you have fought for me, and I will keep fighting until God has decided that our fight is over, and I have made my peace that if He needs you more in heaven than on earth, heaven and the angels will be blessed to have you and i know that you will go on and prepare our place until the day Jesus comes for us all.
I release you from the burden to fight for me if you know that your time has come, and i forgive you Grace for not being everything that I hoped you will be, because of you I will never stop fighting for me! I carry your heart. I carry your heart in mine, in this life and the next.
My beautiful grace was laid to rest on the 14th of October 2021.
My sweet Annabelle
Annabelle was our first mare, saved on the slaughter lot with 5 of our other precious babies in 2015. To share the story with you about this day still brings chills to my spine. We got a phone call from a friend saying there are horses at the auction, we need to come. Upon arrival this is what we found, 6 very scared horses, skinny and full of injuries and open wounds and swollen legs. The other ladies and I spoke about buying them together, however when we went up to the stand to prepare to auction on these petrified babies - the slaughter horse truck driver was already sitting in the stand, i had no idea how to bid i just knew i had to do something, they can NOT be taken to slaughter. A lady in the crowd seeing my terrified face offered to do the bidding on our behalf and i agreed. When the horses came in scared and terrified being poked and prodded to move forward the slaughter truck driver started bidding immediately. The lady started bidding against him and he told me he will buy them and make meat pies out of them.. i will never forget the empty eyes of this big obese guy laughing at the words he spoke to terrify me even more. The bidding went up between him and us and at nr 99 he just said he is not going higher as they don't even have enough meat on them and he won't get the amount out of them he was hoping to. (this would be a bad business decision for him) and that's all it ever was to him. We won the bid and as myself and the other ladies were walking out the auctioneer told me that we have to take them all.. and because the 2 black ones were in a very bad condition and nothing for the eye the ladies withdrew and said they can't take any of them..so there it was.. i just bought 6 horses off the auction having no idea how i am going to manage these horses.. new to horses again after many years of not taking care of them i was scared out of my mind. I will never forget the fear when i phoned my husband to explain to him what just happened... the perfect gentleman he is.. instead of screaming at me he just laughed and said, "we will have to make a plan to go and load them then". And so our journey started with these 5 babies. (one of the ladies at the stable yard took over one of them) Annabelle was the matriarch mare and took care of everyone else in our herd and also disciplined them when necessary. She is out of Thee cyclone with amazing Arabian blood lines. She was not an easy mare and i had to work very hard to win her trust. We found out that she was rejected by the breeders because in there opinion she was a horrible mother and rejected all her foals, losing 4 already by the time she came to us. The day she gave to birth to Annabeth was one of the happiest days of my life... and as expected she wanted nothing to do with her beautiful baby girl and kicked and bit her when she tried to drink or suckle... i was not letting this happen again. On the phone with our vet and my persistence of making this work and telling Annabelle that she was called to be a mother and this precious baby needs her and..... alot of prayer and begging to the Lord... after 4 long hours she let Annabeth drink... and the moment this happened i could see all the stress leaving Annabelle and finally understanding. This was a spectacular moment captured in time and left this mother and daughter team inseparable! Annabelle is the Mother of our beautiful Annabeth as well as Jabez and there was no better mother ever than this amazing girl. Second chances was what she needed with pure love and acceptance.
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The worst part about being a horse owner is to make the right decisions not for ourselves but for our horses... taking in rescue and retired horses is definitely NOT for the faint hearted and some days i don't know where i get the strength from to carry on...
So many people ask me why i take in 'wasted' horses as they are only cost money...which they do.... but they have so much to offer and to teach you. January 2020, This week i had to lay to rest 2 of my ladies which just about killed me with having to be with both on the same day.... but these 2 girls have enriched my life so much and what they have taught me i will carry in my heart forever. Beauty...you were an amazing mare with so much trust issues but you are still my mercedes benz of horses. Your movement and elegance as you carried me made my heart beat faster and slower in the same time...
And my Annabelle.... the words can not find me..... you were home...when i needed to know what home feels like... it was holding you in my arms..you always resembled second chances and new beginings to me...
I will love you in this life and the next.. i give you back to the Creator who has blessed me with you.
My matriarch ladies...my leaders and teachers...
I will carry your heart in mine till we meet again.
My horses become part of who i am.... but when i think about the burden i have to carry some days...eish....i also know that very few people on this earth understand the relationship between a horse and her person... very few people have the level of commitment it takes to do what we do.
I carry this burden with God as my rock and my fortress and i am honoured that God chose me to be the voice of these magnificent beings.